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Look -- we're a little busy now, ok? We're a little preoccupied here. We got stuff to do. But just because we can't answer the mail doesn't mean you shouldn't be able to read a sampling of it, right? In fact, I daresay some of you should start pulling your weight around here and answer some of these fine people's questions. Now tell me, is that too much to ask?

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 05:00:59 -0800
Subject: I WIN

Don and Walt- Just 'cuz I'm not from NY doesn't mean I don't know where
it's at. When are you going to get off your collective asses and put
out a record? I'm not one of your sick fans, who have nothing to do
between STEELY DAN sightings; ...give us what we want....San Francisco
asks for a brand new SD record!!!!!!
-about to Commit Suicide if you don't return my undying love- A Guy

Subject: praise and a plug
Date: Mon, 23 Feb 98 20:29:19 -0000
From: dglassco (

hi gang-
greetings, my name's dave and i am here to confess my addiction to the
dan and to offer a shameless plug for my band, millennium swing. i have
enjoyed the dan's music greatly over the years, and i guess the hours
influenced me more than i thought. my band released it's first album
last year, which drew many a comparison to the dan (i was of course
flattered). if you would like to hear some of the music, you will find
real audio clips and more at i would love to hear any
feedback that the dan fans might have (i obviously respect their taste in
can't wait for the next dan album-
dave glassco

From: "Brent Waite" (
Subject: Glamour Profession
Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 00:01:29 -0700

To the Dan:

I have not yet had any response to my generous offer to provide
legal representation in exchange only for explications of Steely
Dan lyrics. (Those cryptic notes under the song titles from
Alive in America fail as consideration since I already paid
for them.)

Even though you are busy, I thought you would jump at the
rare opportunity to prove wrong the old adage that the only
thing certain about the law is the expense. Heck, what have
you got to lose considering your stellar legal track record
stretching from Baldino, Losi, Lansky, Schultz & Madden
back to the baffoon who "negotiated" that first stellar contract
you never seemed to have forgotten.

Considering that your absence of collaborative effort has
produced a Decade and a Half of No Steely Dan, and
that this new effort seems to be dragging on, my take
on the situation is that you've run out of good lyrical
material . To evidence my good faith and honest
intent to promote and not exploit, I present you with
the following three cases that should help cure this
situation: Favrot v. Barnes, 332 Southern Reporter 2d 873
(Louisiana Court of Appeals, 1976); People v. Westbrook,
576 New York Supplement 372 (Supreme Court, 1991);
and People v. Bauder, 941 Pacific Reporter 282 (Colo. Supreme
Court, 1997). I add my own experience of suing a local
town minister over adverse possession of an outhouse.

Country Lawyer

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 09:24:22 EST
Subject: watching and waiting

Dear sardonic dudes,
With ears to the the ground, we wait paitently for an F major7th to ooze from
a matchless chieftian. " Alive" and "citizen" can only sustain our hungry
souls for so long. Put down the coconuts...forego the white fish...and tickle
our auditory nerves .

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 14:48:38 +0000
Subject: Alienation ?

Erm, hello ?

I just have to say all this is too scary for me, Im English, I dont
understand all this Ironic wit and I dont understand computers. What is
cleveland ?

The thirteenth Duke of Winborn.

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 15:15:27 +0000
Subject: MOJO

Dearest Donald and Walter,
I am a regular reader of the english music mag MOJO, I notice their
writers appear to be big fans of yours and Brian Wilson appears to be a
big fan of theirs (his faculties still at their zenith?) I wondered if
you had any particular respect for them as I know Donald did an
excellent article on Charlie Parker for the aforementioned mag.
keep going,
Neil Hammond, Doncaster, England.

P.S Walter, are you related to a girl I went to school with ?
Im afraid I cant remember her name.

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 18:03:19 -0700
From: David Murrell (
Subject: Hi guys.

I was helping out with a benefit concert for E-Town last year (The NPR
radio show) and the musical guests were David Crosby and Michelle

I ended up sitting next to David at dinner where we confessed our mutual
love for SD. I told him that I named my motorcycle (85' Honda 700)
'Steely Dan' and we shared a laugh...

After dinner I drove David back to his hotel.

I'm not sure I could accurately convey to you ...flying down the
highway, in the warm, Utah, summer, night player open....singing a few tracks from Alive in America
with David Crosby.

Yes, I am. Alive in America.

Dozo Yoroshiku,


Date: Thu, 26 Feb 1998 02:19:30 -0500
From: Guest (
Subject: Alive in America

You guys are the greatest. Keep producing some of the best music that
this dim, dark, bleak world has to offer.


Loyal Devoted Dan FAN

From: Kelltor (
Date: Thu, 26 Feb 1998 23:31:31 EST
Subject: BBQ

Mssrs. Becker and Fagan,

Your presence is demanded at a BBQ in our honor on 21 June 1998 (year of our
lord) 4PM-?.
For the explicit purpose of making you listen to our songs, refreshments will
be provided. These refreshments will consist of killing floor sweepings(slow
roasted over top of the line briquettes) and Pabst Blue Ribbon beer.
Vegetarians are welcome to enjoy any of our fine suburban lawn, but we cannot
be held responsible for the outcome of their adherance to their "alternative
dietary regiment." *Please note: By reading this letter, you legally bind
yourself in agreement to its terms. We look forward to hearing from you.

As Always We Remain,

Jim McGinley & Tony Volpone

(Heterosexual Musicians)
P.S. Please adress all future correspondences to the following e-mail

Date: Fri, 27 Feb 1998 21:25:16 +0800
Subject: Fan Offer

Dear Mr Dan,

I enjoyed your site immensely and would gladly be a fan. Unfortunately I
have never had occasion to listen to any of your music. I would be more
than willing to 'cock an ear' as it were. Therefore if you would send
me the complete body of your work whether records on compact disc format
or filmed performances on any popular video tape format I would
definately give it my best shot.

What's more my current equipment is less than perfect. So as to do
justice to your efforts and to stand a better chance of my appreciating
your work you might consider also supplying equipment which might best
enhance the quality of your performances.

I feel sure that given the opportunity I would become a valuable
addition to your circle of fans.

Should my offer be acceptable please reply and I shall send you mailing

Many thanks in advance

Paul Loosley

PS I also extend this offer to your contempories

Date: Mon, 02 Mar 1998 08:44:30 -0600
From: David Stringfellow (
Subject: The New One

Hello --

I've been perusing the Web site just after hearing a rumor that there is
a new album due. I must have had my head in the sand, because I
consider myself a Dan fanatic. However, I can't really find the answer to the
following questions anywhere on this site (I have to admit I haven't
tried real hard).

1) When is the new album/CD due in the stores?
2) Is is actually called "The New One"?
3) Do you plan a related tour?


Date: Wed, 04 Mar 1998 01:54:03 -0800
From: Todd Volkert (
Subject: Seeking your wisdom

What an awesome web site - much better than any other musician websites
I've found.

Anyway, the reason I'm writing, Walter and Donald, is that I'd like to
become your apprentice. I assume that you've been asked before to be
mentors to some aspiring songwriter/musician/producer, but I'm writing
anyway in case you guys were just talking about how you would love to
start imparting all of your knowlege on some youngster. If the answer
is an outright "NO," please write me back and say so. If you are
intrigued and have some questions for me.. well, write me back as well.
In the meantime, here's some info on me:
I've been playing bass for a year, guitar for three months, Irish
Pennywhistle for a year, and singing all my life. I'm twenty-one years
old and poised to graduate UC Berkeley in December with a degree in
Electrical Engineering and Computer Science. I produced my first album
(amateur) last November - 15 tracks of my roommate's compositions. I
haven't had any formal instrument training but have been playing guitar
for about five hours a day for the past two months. In any case, I look
forward to your response.

Todd Volkert

Date: Wed, 4 Mar 1998 03:05:35 -0800 (PST)
From: Anoush Gharagozlou (
Subject: a fan from the other side

Dear Donald and Walter,

I'm really happy to have this opportunity to write you.
Excuse my English since I don't speak it well.
I'm 37 year old and live in Paris (France) since 1978. I was born in
Tehran (Iran) and Steely Dan was among the first western music I used
to listen there. I must say that you were already the best and you are
still my best favorite band. Your jazzy style opened my mind to this
great beautiful music since my childhood and now I love this music and
never forget that you were at the origin of my discovery.
Since the last years in Tehran, I started to learn guitar with a
teacher who was also a jazzman. Every young musician has certainly a
wish and often imagine himself playing with his favorite band. I have
to say that I listen a great variety of music (rock, pure jazz,
jazz-rock, fusion, funk, rap, and I forget...) and I appreciate all of
these kinds but if someone asks me with whom I would like to play, I
would answer with SD without hesitation. I know this is just a sweet
dream, but know that you are in my heart forever. I have another wish:
to see you in concert in Paris! Do you have any plan to come to Paris?
Actually I have many many wishes regarding SD. Why don't you write a
new album together? I really appreciate your singles. I buy them as
soon as they are sold and I love them all. And I think that you were
right to experience writing alone. I was sensible to what you said
Donald (in Nightfly) about your childhood memories, since this is a
period where everything is built within someone. I think that you,
Donald and Walter, have still to write single albums but writing
together again is more than just writing an album. It's about making
true a dream of millions of your fans. It's again about childhood
memories, this time in your fans' mind, who knew you from their
childhood. It's just about making wishes coming true. I read among
your mails that someone called you GOD. Tell me what's the difference
if you have this power to satisfy millions of people's soul ?

Needless to say that I have all your albums (SD and your singles too),
and I get never tired to listen them again and again.
Finaly, I must say that I was and I am always impressed with the
number of musicians in your albums. Some of them started their careers
by playing with you and are very famous now.
For my part, if sometimes I need to listen to some new things, I just
look at your musicians and try to search what they have done since
playing with you, and I buy their album just because I trust YOU. And
until now I've been right.

Thanks for all you have given.
Keep alive Steely Dan.

Anoush Gharagozlou

Date: Wed, 04 Mar 1998 21:42:00 -0500
From: Harold Case (

Please send to me via snail mail any shred or piece of fan club
information you happen to possess. I am an extremely avid fan (having
99.9 percent of SD's recorded output. As of yet, since I am not an
owner of a computer(this is a friend's), pleaser send any fan club
address to:
Steve Gordon
57 1st Avenue NW
Lafayette, AL 36862-2001
no E-mail(yet)

Many, many thanks on a fantastic webpage!!!!

Yours in Fandom,
Steve Gordon

From: POfarr792 (
Date: Sat, 7 Mar 1998 09:18:24 EST
Subject: pictures

I have never ever seen a picture of either of the guys can you send me one of
a good one of what they look like.

Date: Sat, 7 Mar 1998 21:17:05 EST
Subject: A open letter...

Donald and Walter-

I wanted to thank you both for filling my life for some great music, which has
coinsided with some of the better times of my life. I am only 25, but I have
been listening to Dan since I was 15. I have the full catalog, and enjoy it
often. I find it ironic, only in that my big hobby is automotives...I have
bought 4 cars in my life. Upon picking each one up, on the ride home, I would
put on the radio, each time, I have found a Dan tune. It makes me feel that
all times in the car will be great. Thank you for the life enriching music.

Rich Lospinoso

Date: Tue, 10 Mar 1998 15:35:41 -0500
From: Duckman (
Subject: "Bodhisattva" insight for student

Hello there. I am a college student in Florida doing a term report on
bodhisattvas. I thought it would be interesting to the class to play the
SD song, and discuss the lyrics. If someone can share opinions, or point
me to a resource or website that has SD interviews where they discuss
it, I would be very thankful. THANKS!

Date: Fri, 13 Mar 1998 13:51:56 -0800
From: Lindsay Feuling (
Subject: What's the deal?

Everytime I watch the DanCam page, I see you guys dancing around.
And if I'm not mistaken, I have seen this same sequence of pictures
before. Either that or you do the same dance when I do see you dancing.
Not that I really mind, because (and now here comes the patronizing
stuff) I really enjoy your music.

Date: Sun, 15 Mar 1998 18:46:35 +0000
From: "." (

Dear D & W,

I am writing to request further explanation as to why "Squirrel" is a
no-no in songwriting.

I mean, doesn't it rhyme with "Virile" (pron. Vir-il) in America? Okay,
over here in England we pronounce it Vir-ile, so it wouldn't work. But
how about a lyric about being as "Virile as a squirrel"?

I haven't copyrighted the lyric so please feel free to plunder.

Yours sincerely,

Olly Dennis.

P.S. You were absolutely blinding at Wembley Arena on the tour. Quite

From: "Keith Shapiro" (
Subject: I would just like to say.....
Date: Mon, 16 Mar 1998 22:02:25 -0800

That although I have listened for hours on end to just about everything
available by SD I am just in awe at Surf And/Or Die. The guitar parts in
this incredible piece of music are just amazing! I can't even begin to
express the awesome feeling this song has! Why I am saying this I don't know
but it needed to be said!

From: (Jon S.)
Date: Tue, 17 Mar 1998 23:56:57 -0500
Subject: don & Walt

I love you guys, but i wish you would be a little more proactive about

Date: Wed, 18 Mar 1998 19:40:23 -0700
From: Dean Phelps (
Subject: Filtering mail?

Dear Sirs,

We posted a message a while back in Dec sometime, to no avail it was not
posted. We were wondering who is playing on the new record. B.
Purdie? C. Rainey? Please let us know were drinking!

Dean and Petur

P.S.- I hope this letter makes it through the corporate filter.

SD WebDrone replies:Corporate?! Sorry boys, this is strictly a mom-and-pop operation. But yes, my intelligent young lions, you have astutely inferred that not every message sent to this site is transcribed by my hard-working fingers -- already mere bloody stumps -- into HTML code to appear on-line for all to read and enjoy. In fact, only a modest minority of all incoming e-mail is posted, according to criteria that shall forever remain opaque to you and your brethren. But, if spying your booze-splattered thumb prints somewhere on the SD site is truly that important, you might want to search for familiar smudges in our Dead Letter Department.

From: "Joseph Fernandez" (
Subject: An epistle of appreciation...
Date: Fri, 20 Mar 1998 03:03:16 PST

Messrs. Steely Dan,
Here are a few words of appreciation across the cyber-miles that set us
On tequila-scented evenings here on the Coromandel Coast of Southern
India, the heady sounds of Steely Dan are savoured. The balmy breezes
that this East Coast is known for, only serve to accentuate the
I do hope, Sirs, that this little epistle will go a long way in
convincing you that your music make ripples in the farthest corners of
this world.
With a decade of appreciation,
Joseph Fernandez

From: "Andrea Diarena" (
Subject: greetings from Cyprus aStonia
Date: Sat, 21 Mar 1998 18:53:06 +0200


Date: Sat, 21 Mar 1998 15:52:11 +0000
From: David Siegle (
Subject: ???When, already???

Okay, fellas, there's only so much you can do with a mixdown, y'know? As
much as the whole Steely mystique centers around when your perfectionist
proclivities are finally satisfied, some of us aren't getting any
younger. So maybe you'll be ready to release sometime this century, hey,
while the arteries are still fairly clear and the organs still benign?
Incidental notes: This time of year always puts me in a Steely frame of
mind because of the Oscars, about which I could care less, save for
savoring that wonderful tag line from Show Biz Kids...
My 13-year-old daughter, who listens to real oldies on the radio and
hums melodies from her school band tunes as if they were fine art, has
latched onto "...Whack," to my everlasting amazement and gratitude.
Somehow I never thought she'd be a Steely head, but it makes me feel a
bit more optimistic about the future...
So apply yourselves assiduously, boys. The youth of America (and some of
their decrepit elders) wait at your pleasure...
David H. Siegle

Date: Sat, 21 Mar 98 04:51:50 UT
From: "xxxx"

Steely Dan,
...Check this out my fellow Steely Dan Freaks, my brother, who introduced me to the band some years back, named his first daughter Steely. Swear to God! The thing is that I don't know if he's aware of the fact he named his little girl after a DILDO!! I doubt he's ever read Naked Lunch but I really doubt it...
Please do not show my E-mail address. Thank you.

Date: Sat, 21 Mar 1998 22:39:04 -0300
From: Pablo Bombicino (
Subject: please

I'd like you to send me all sort of information about your group , projects, and if it's
possible a photo with their firm.
Thanks for your fantastic music.

Pablo Alejandro Bombicino
Ramón L. Falcón 1336, Piso 4(o), Dpto. "A"
Capital Federal, Buenos Aires
C.P. 1406

From: "Blake, David" (
Subject: Hi from one of your biggest (not just in size) fans :-0
Date: Mon, 23 Mar 1998 13:11:40 -0500

Got to check out the performance at the GTE VIRGINIA BEACH AMPHITHEATER last
year and I noticed that the horn section was using some type of
pitch-to-midi interface. Are these devices available to the general public
or a special design for the band only??
Any info on pitch-to-midi devices would be greatly appreciated !!
Love your WEB Site too ............

Thanks - Dave :-)

Date: Thu, 26 Mar 1998 18:23:24 +0100
From: regnier (
Subject: New album?


Are you back together now?

If yes, when a new album is scheduled?


Love from France


Date: Sat, 28 Mar 1998 14:09:09 -0500
From: Willie Cruz (
Subject: Great music

I'm a 23 year old law student from the Republic of Panama. The first
time I heard Steely Dan I was probably, 11. My older brother gave a
tape for me to take on an airplane, and he recorded Hey Nineteen; and
believe me I loved it ever since, eventhough I didn't have a clue as to
who was the group!!!! Probably when I was 15 I played a record that
said Gaucho, and I thought it was going to be argentinian music, when I
see "Hey Nineteen" on the tracks. Imagine that, I had found musical

You play great music, and I only hope that some day you get to tour
Latin America, but closer to Panama, since all the great bands usually
play Brazil and Argentina only, making very expensive for us Central
Americans to see you guys rock. Trust me, it would be a dream come true
to see Hey Nineteen, or Reeling in the years live in my country, or
somewhere close, and safe, as Costa Rica. Good luck in your new

A fan from Panama

From: Id est 1 (
Date: Sat, 28 Mar 1998 19:38:05 EST
Subject: i really

i really like your music; it's got a good beat and is easy to dance to.

Date: Mon, 30 Mar 1998 14:46:36 -0800
From: "Lionel A. Guilbert" (
Subject: Thanks for the good times

To D. Fagen and W. Becker:
I just wanted to say Thank You for this great music you have put together
all those years! I am from Morocco and I came across AJA in 1984 almost
by accident, a tape was left in a rental car I rented! I was hooked
instantly, but no one knew Steely Dan in Morocco (and still don't), so I
had to wait for vacation trips to Europe to fing the rest of the albums.

I never got tired of any song or album, and I think AJA is the best of
all. I moved to Sarasota, Florida in 1992 and scanning the local FM
stations I heard PEG. I could not believe it since that was the first
time I heard Steely Dan outside of my own stereo! One rado in Tampa
(102.5 The Point) plays more Steely Dan tune than any other one I know,
at least 2 or 3 a day, most of them from Aja or Gaucho. Anyway, I went
to your concert in August 94 in St. Petersburg, FL. I was so happy and
eager to get in that I parked my car at the wrong spot, it got towed away
during the concert! It doesn't matter, it was so much worthit! I can
wait for new CDs and Tour dates.

I introduced your music to some of my friends and family, they all love

Thanks again. LAG

From: Violetlull (
Date: Tue, 31 Mar 1998 16:14:20 EST

voulez voulez voulez vous?

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